“I saw the angel in the marble and carved until I set him free”
-Michelangelo
Picture This!
What do you think of when I use the word ‘imagination’? Say for instance I ask you to picture the Taj Mahal in your head. Your memories of Taj Mahal from pictures, post cards or BruisedPassports’ IG page work at the speed of light in projecting the minarets of Taj Mahal on the canvas in your head. Or say, I ask you to picture your Mom’s face? Your Mom’s face from her last Whatsapp DP may paint itself before your eyes or you may see her as an animated figure from a past memory.
What if I told you there are people who aren’t physically capable to do this?
And what if I told you that these people are some of the most creative geniuses in the business of imagination? Like, how would you respond if I told you that Ed Catmull, co-founder of Pixar and leader of revolutions in 3D-animation, ‘suffered’ from this neurological condition called Aphantasia?
Are you blown away yet?
I know I was.
What is Aphantasia?
The term ‘aphantasia’ comes from the Greek words a, meaning “without”, and phantasia, meaning “a capacity to form mental images”. According to Craig Venter, the biologist who created the first synthetic organism: “It’s like having a computer store the information, but you don’t have a screen attached to the computer.”
For years I have conflated the idea of imagination as something the back of your eyeball can create. Every presentation I worked on, every character arc I plotted, every battle scene I typed out, even the dance I choreographed for my school farewell, I visualised a brief hazy scene in my mind before putting thought to action. So, naturally, in my ignorance, I considered imagination to be synonymous with summoning mental images. Not just me. J.K. Rowling called imagination to be the uniquely human capacity to envision that which is not. Envision-the very word is entrenched in in the ability to see, create and mould with the mind’s eye.
But when I read the article where Ed Catmull announced that his mind’s eye is blind, and that he found other animators at Pixar with aphantasia, my mind was blown. In fact, the New York Times reported two months ago on the ways the scientists are studying aphantasia, along with its opposite, hyperphantasia, or a mind’s eye that’s so vivid it’s sometimes hard to distinguish between what’s real and what’s not.
How does it work for someone with aphantasia ?
Mozilla’s cofounder Blake Ross, in his essay about what it is like to have aphantasia describes the landscape of his mind’s inner voice:
“All narration, all the time. An infinite script of milk voice dialogue. When you read a sarcastic essay from me, it is a transcript of this voice.”
And he is not alone. Researchers say that 2 to 5% of the population suffer from congenital aphantasia and cannot form mental imagery. It is almost like they use their mind’s brain to think in radio instead of TV. Here are some other testimonials from the people who think without pictures:
“Certain non-imagers, like myself, compensate for the lack of visuals with kinesthetic information, or the memory of motion; for instance, recalling the motions necessary to trace a loved one’s features instead of seeing the face itself, or remembering the layout of a house by recalling the motions necessary to move through it while performing daily tasks.”
“Part of me still believes that when people say they’re ‘picturing’ something, they mean it metaphorically, like I do,” says Kelly Sandoval, a fiction writer from Seattle who is a natural non-imager. “To me, seeing images in your head sounds like a superpower.”
Does Aphantasia pose a disadvantage?
One of the greats of grimdark fantasy genre, Mark Lawrence, shared about how he discovered he had aphantasia:
“Decades ago, my wife began visualisation for meditation. I couldn’t do it. Not only could I not see an imaginary orange, I couldn’t see a circle or the colour orange. But I understood visualisation to be a special skill that you worked on. Rather like juggling. And I was sure that with practice I could accomplish either one of those.
Then a year ago, I read an article online about aphantasia and all at once I understood that pretty much everyone visualised their thoughts all the time!”
At first, Lawrence says he felt robbed of something, but then he came around. For did his ‘inability’ to visualise deter him from creating fantastical words of beauty. No.
“These days, I reject the description of aphantasia as a defect. I see it as an alternative. You see a horse if asked to imagine one. I find this rather limiting. I imagine a web of horse-stuff that leads me down many paths. The idea of seeing one particular horse actually lacks appeal. What if it’s not the horse I want? What if I want something larger, more fundamental than an image?”
Understanding the Essence of Imagination
In fact, a 2003 meta-study concluded that when it comes to creative thinking, the benefit of mental imagery is surprisingly small especially considering how overactive visual imagery is thought to play a role in addiction and cravings, as well as the development of anxiety disorders such as PTSD.
Edward Catmull surmises it best:
“The other one I think that people might have assumed, but if you think about it you can see why it’s false assumption, is you would think if a person could visualise, they’re more likely to be able to draw….If you open your eyes and you take out a pencil and pad, how many people can draw what they see? The answer is a very small number, so if you can’t draw what is in front of you then why would we expect that you would be able to draw what you visualise?”
Aphantasia and Writing
Personally, I am fascinated with the idea of aphantasia. Especially because I can see how absence of visual hindrances to imagination could make one sensitive to the ebbs and flow of prose and poetry, and make it easier to jot the words down. Most of my writer block phases that I encountered while writing my book were a result of a failed movie productions in my mind.
It also brings to memory the movie Ship of Theseus where a visually challenged albeit gifted photographer, Aaliya, seeks moments through sound rather than sight. Post a cornea transplant, she finds it difficult to take good pictures highlighting the paradox that her art has been damaged because of her restored eyesight.
So, maybe it is time to rethink the term mind’s eye, and leave it just to a ‘mind’. For while the world runs on the clouds of imagination, like clouds, imagination can take many forms.
